Christian Chat

[ENKELI]

 I have lost my belief that God loves me.

Nothing good has happened in my life in over 12 months.

I am obese. Nobody wants to hang out with me. Nobody wants to hire me.

I have no money to get my teeth fixed. I am so ugly with missing teeth and fat gut.

My house has been neglected by my brother while I lived elsewhere. It's good no one wants to spend time with me because I'm ashamed of the poor condition of my house. 

It makes sense that my family would reject me in the various ways they have.

My church friends have left me, they are too busy for me.

I love God, I just wish He loved me.

Sorry for wasting everyone's time, I had no one else to talk to and I had to get it out before I felt like I'd break in 2

[Ru-bee]

Hi @ENKELI 

I'm so sorry that you're feeling that nothing good has come your way. A year is certainly a long time to not see be seeing any good come into your life. 

I'm hearing that the events of this year and the challenges you've been up against have left you feeling rejected, both by those around you, and by God. While I am not a Christian, I did want to check in on you, as I can hear the pain you're going through right now. I will leave it to our other lovely members to speak to the faith aspects of what you're going through, but I just wanted you to know that you're not alone here, and you're never wasting anyone's time

[Dimity]

Hello @ENKELI my dear. Sending love ❤️ and hugs 🫂 .

I too doubt at times. But that's when some sort of core faith kicks in - "forgive Lord my disbelief "  And there's the footsteps story - that when we think we're abandoned and alone Jesus's is carrying us.

I tend to think God is seen in His creation and in the reaching out of good people.  There are so many good people in the forums, including you yourself. 

I get some comfort by following Soul Shepherding, ministered by Christian psychologists,  who offer many insights to coping with MH difficulties They highlight from Scripture how Jesus being fully human (as well as fully divine) drew on solitude, prayer and social connection and sharing food and fellowship at different times in dealing with His own needs.as well as ministering to others.

I too feel ugly and inadequate but in God's grace and mercy I'm sometimes seen and accepted when I least expect it.

As in the last line of the Irish blessing, until we meet again may God hold you in the hollow of His hands.

I'm sorry I can't respond with formulaic Christian phrases and quotes as I'm not educated in that regard but I care deeply and pray you find solace.

[Appleblossom]

https://youtu.be/x52-VKWI9hg 

16 th century music set to psalm 18…. Lord you are my rock…soothes me when we play it. Though, we are  not the Royal Wind.

 @Dimity @avant-garde 

@ENKELI gentle hugs. It’s sad that church can feel a hard place to be.  Find your own path. I have often been rejected. It’s not easy. Take care 

🍎 

[Shaz51]

God loves you @ENKELI , @Appleblossom , @Dimity , @Ru-bee , @avant-garde 

he is with us all the time 

we have not church friends 

now we don`t go to church as they have changed the times 

[avant-garde]

Oh my sweet  @ENKELI 

I can't say I've walked your shoes. I can't say I have your faith. I can't say I know your heartache. But I can say I see God's grace. 

I can't heal your heart, but I know I can tell you that the darkness fades and the light breaks through.

You know how often I think "why would God love me?"

I'm a 35 year old with no family, no job, no children, who grew up like "yep" and has been running for 15 years. 

I have arthritis in my lower back, knees and ankles. I'm missing 9 teeth with one more to come out. I was told constantly growing up that God doesn't love me because of "yep".

I could give you the scriptures and the quotes but I reckon you already know them.

One truth I come back to though is John 3:16 "for God so loved the world"

I read that scripture and I notice more of what it doesn't say, it doesn't say "except".

I can't say that I don't love God, but neither can he say that he doesn't love me. I may think I'm not worth it, with all that I've been through, all that I've seen, all I've experienced.

I still struggle with believing that our God could love me, what the heck did I do to deserve my upbringing? nothing. God is not particular of persons, but what I do know is that nothing we do affects our standing with God as his sons and daughters, that he chose us, he redeemed us and he never changes his mind. 

my sweet @ENKELI 

he hasn't changed his mind about you

[ENKELI]

@avant-garde darling heart, your words brought tears to my eyes. I see you as such a strong person and when you list what you've been through I see where God has been in my own life.

You are amazing and I am honoured to call you my friend 😍

[avant-garde]

I have a question that I don't know who to ask...

How common is it for Christians to just tell you what they think you want to hear rather than what they believe? 

@ENKELI @Shaz51 @Appleblossom @Dimity @tyme 

[ENKELI]

@avant-garde in all honesty, about the same as a non Christian would. My opinion only but it sounds like you've experienced what you feel is someone telling you what they think you want to hear?
I have had a pastor quickly agree with me just so he could move on to talk to someone else.

Unfortunately not every believer is as "Christian" as they like to make you think.

Hugs beautiful 🫂

[ENKELI]

@Ru-bee this is very belated but thank you for you words and love. I am constantly amazed at the outpouring of care on SANE and while you may not be a Christian, I believe God chose you to speak to me xoxo 🫂