Hot Chocolate Anyone ?

[Faith-and-Hope]

I generally know my limits @PeppiPatty .... but my husband's illness is stretching all our limits ...., we are caught in his regimen as well for now .....

🌷💜

[PeppiPatty]

I've noticed that you know your limits @Faith-and-Hope

One of the most hardest things for me was to recognise that I was'nt coping when I first joined Sane Forums. 

Then that I really needed to learn more of my husbands illness.....then even more embarrassing.my own limitations. 

Last night, I didnt get paid my wages. We are both exhausted. He's started smoking. I'm really annoyed and actually angry that I'm paying for his cigarettes tomorrow when I do get paid. 

Then an elderly lady rang and complained about me and my cleaning and I feel like exploding. Then it gets worse, I ca'nt go to bible study tomorrow morning and I really want to go. 

Then.....out of the blue, my Psychotherapist emails me with some information about my book which is going to mean HUGE amounts of work for me in the story I've already written but it will become more like what I want it like. Bt everything is so hard and I just want a break I cannot even imagine what it is like for you. It would be hard. hard. Darling lady.

PP 

[Former-Member]

MORNING! COFFEE TIME! Have to tell someone how good I feel. Its 4.30am here, still dark but the bird morning song has begun. I feel wide awake, but more than that, maybe the endorphin s from yesterdays good walk have kicked in because my mind is clearer, and my mood is good, dare i say - 'happy' Hmm, Am I even allowed to be happy after losing a child? Perhaps 'positive peace' is a better description than happy, long time coming. Its a bit surreal but about to start my day with a cuppa coffee. Any joiners? 🙂

[LooneyToones]

What a lovely cheery message to start the day! So glad you feel happy and positive Tawney-doesn't matter what it is, just continue to enjoy. 🍪 Here's a biscuit to have with your coffee 😀

[Faith-and-Hope]

Hi @PeppiPatty .... 🌷💕

Like most people, I have better days than others .... I am feeling a bit out of sorts this week cos it's my husband's ed affecting his thinking that has him holding the expectation over me that it's my place to be preparing and cooking his lunch every day, and washing his gym clothes every night.  Serving his regimen has thrown my own organisation and order to the wind .... but I just have to grit my teeth and persevere with it for now cos it's sparing us from his uptight tantrums.  Without "staff" his regimen is too much to fit into the day, so I have become a servant to the ed for the moment .... grrrr 

.... for the moment .... !!

I am sure you feel that way about buying your hubby's cigarettes .... just keep telling yourself it's "for the moment" until you can get him off them again.

I know it means a lot of work, but your book project sounds amazing ❣

Hi @Former-Member ..... 😄

Ready for that coffee when you are ... ❣

Are there any more biscuits @LooneyToones ?  How are you this morning ?

☕️🍪☕️🍪☕️🍪💕

[Former-Member]

@Faith-and-Hope ❤..I think it's challenging in relationships 'expectation'..
I feel much as you both do right now @peppi Patty..
Hmm not easy.
I have swim for little man, really don't feel up to it, but I'm pushing everything I got.
Then errands etc.
I hope we all find a few moments of solace today xxx

[Faith-and-Hope]

@Former-Member 

This "expectation" was WH's mother's way of thinking, and as a couple we disowned it many years ago .... replacing it with our own balance.  Well .... it's back ..... but only because he is unwell and being driven by his illness into thinking it's okay to have these expectations now .... and his mother is so pleased !!  

Double grrr ....

His 2 x daily jogs take him to her house for coffee cos she is supportive of another ed habit that is part of his regimen.  Won't detail it here, but it's referred to as c/s.  Once he is diagnosed and treated, she will lose all this, so it suits her for him to stay unwell.  

His family have been enabling him, but now some of them are becoming worried.

Just gotta keep swimming .... walking .... getting up and on .... things will work out .... 🌷💜

Wishing you good energy for the stuff you don't feel like doing today .... 😘

[LooneyToones]

Plenty more bikkies I'll even throw in a 🍩🍩. Feeling good here just Dr the usual inertia 😟 But I have some knitting & quilting to do so the sooner I begin the better. Enjoy your coffee & snack and have a wonderful day. 💕

[Faith-and-Hope]

Thanks @LooneyToones ....

Knitting and quilting sounds awesome .... 

@PeppiPatty quilts too I think ....

Have a good day everyone ....

❤️💕

[PeppiPatty]

Hello @LooneyToones and @Former-Member

What a good name @LooneyToones......My early memories of being 4 and 5 and watching bugs bunny ! 

How lovely. 

Hi @Former-Member...... I would love to have a coffee with you today...How are you? I'm not quite sure how to answer in that question....can you tell me what you would like to write ?

Thanks for trusting us to write this. It felt like a strong statement from you ...."Am I allowed to be happy after losing a child."