having a bad morning

[BlueBay]

 Hey everyone, 

here are my scarves tht i have made.  Oh i forgot one.  The orange one is made from cotton.

[BlueBay]

i have been crying most of the day.  Even last night going to bed, the tears just flowed.

The CAT team called today to see how i was and i told them i was crying a lot today.  They suggested i take an anxiety tablet and try to rest.  She said to me that she will contact my psych tomorrow morning and talk to him and see whether he will put me back in hospital.  If he says no then they will suggest that they will work with him and support me on my meds change while not going back into hospital.

i did have a rest and then when hubby came home we took jersey for a walk along the beach.  i told hubby that i am stressing as there are so many stressors in our lives at the moment.  So we have gone back to thinking lets try to sell our home and get rid of our negative people/things in our lives.  if we do sell for a really good price then we can buy cheaper and have money left over, which would help us financially.

it was interresting because after we spoke the real estate agent called to see how i am.  he knows i was in hospital for depression.  he said that now is a really good market for selling and buying but no pressure as he knows i am suffering.  he said he understands what its like because he suffered similar with bad anxiety 6 yrs ago and changed his life around with getting rid of negative poeple in his life.

[Faith-and-Hope]

Wow @BlueBay .... you've had a really topsy-turvey day today .... but something seems to be surfacing out of it ..... you have received a lot of support and understanding today 💗💕

I saw your poem on the Writing thread for your neice .... that is probably contributing to your tears today .... gentle hugs ..... 💐

[utopia]

@BlueBay. I love the scarfs - especially the olive green colour. You are one crafty lady. Wish I had half of your talent.
I'm so pleased thd CAT member called back today. And how good that they will work with your psychiatrist. That's brilliant news and can only mean an improvement in your mental health.
It's good you and hubby went for a walk with your dog and then had a really good conversation. Keep that communication going

[BlueBay]

Thanks @utopia for the compliment.  I'm really not talented, i just try but they did turn out okay. 

Yes, tomorrow i have an appt with my psych, so more honest talking tomorrow with him.  i think it is time that i tell him i am not 100% and now with the CAT team phoning him he will realise things aren't that good.

how is your cold? are you feeling better?

[utopia]

Im going to argue with you now @sasgirl. You ARE talented. You have knitted some beautiful items - bags & scarfs. I couldn't do it.
Your going to have to learn to take a compliment - because I'm sure you have talent in other areas as well.
I think this CAT group will help push your psychiatrist to see that you may need anotherhospital sstay. And I think you will make more progress this time. I think you're ready for it. Hopefully there call will make him really listen to you. I hope it goes well. Keep up posted.
I'm on the mend. Still have a big cough but it's not hurting any more. Amazing how a simple head cold can knock me down so hard - both physically and mentally. I think in 2 more days I'll be right to drive to our large town and do some shopping. Yay.

[BlueBay]

Thank you @utopia.  I seem to struggle big time with compliments.  Even last week at work a lady complimented me on my hair cut and I just sort of said thanks but quickly walked off. I don't know why i am like this.

I really hope the CAT team have a good chat with my pysch this morning before I go at 11am.  

I had another horrible and weird dream last night.  This time I was talking to a dead person.  He was warning me to move away from the open streets where I could be shot or killed. I have never ever dreamt of this guy before, he passed away only 5 months ago.  I dont understand dreams.

I'm going to go for a walk this morning down the beach and then off to my psych.  i will let you know how i go.

i think since my psych has changed my strength of meds so much over the past 3 weeks my level of emotions has increased, my crying, i feel like i am going up and down in extreme.

[Faith-and-Hope]

I hope your day settles down for you @BlueBay ..... ❤️🌹🍓

[BlueBay]

Thanks @faithandhope xx
Thank you @Decadian for giving me instructions on how to put pictures up. I may even put one up of my dog jersey. xxx

[Faith-and-Hope]

We would love to meet your Jersey @BlueBay ❣