I think i need to ditto @Mazarita. She said it so well @CheerBear. 

Have faith that things will become better once you’ve decided. I think the decision is heartachingly (new word) terrifying for you. You will get past it and it will be ok again. I know this is really big but I know you’ve got this. You can do it and go on without having to look back at the what if’s. They don’t have to be a part of your future whatever you decide. Hugs and lots of them. 💜