Agree with your comments, thanks Jo. 'Ignoring early signs of mental instability' really hits home. But as you say, we are only human and chances are there was a lot going on in our own lives and we may not always be on top of everything ourselves. 

This is still very new to me. Sofar I've found the greatest help from books and ARAFMI workshops. Just finished reading "Walking on Eggshells" by F.M. Bowler - a very down to earth writer. It's in the BCC library.